Hey please read the whole piece i need some advice on this issue from my childhood?

Don't worry, there is still hope for you. From what I can see, what you need is acceptance and closure. You see, you had a hard time as a child that's why you grew up bitter and angry. You are afraid to form relationships because you fear you might ruin it. I don't know exactly the whole situation but you need to talk to someone really close to you like your best friend or a relative. If you don't have someone like that in your life, maybe you could seek professional help. Before you are able to move on, you have to accept everything that has happened in the past and put a closure to it. Acceptance in the key. Praying will also help you. Form a close relationship with GOD whatever is your religion. It helps if you can talk to someone even if you don't see them. I hope this help. Goodluck.